Kevin Menezes

Loved and Saved by God alone to Love and Serve God alone.

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Family Fights: You Lose Even When You Win

​The only battle you’ll never win is the one you fight against your own family. Any man who verbally, emotionally, physically or psychologically beats his own wife, kids or parents down and expects to win is a fool because when they lose, YOU LOSE.   

Jesus said, “a house divided against itself shall not stand” because fights within the family are like cancer. The real reason cancer is so deadly is because it’s not caused by an external virus or bacteria. It’s an internal fight. Cancer is basically your body fighting you. It’s like a civil war breaking out inside you. You can only survive when the fighting stops. 

So, what you really need is for everyone connected to you to be winning everything — all the time. That’s why you’ve got to take the high road and walk away from some fights. They are really not worth your time and energy because even if you win, you still lose. The Bible says “anger rests in the bosom of fools” and “avoiding a fight is a mark of honor; only fools insist on quarrelling.”

Basically, God is asking you to be wise and stop fighting against everybody and yourself.

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War & The Butterfly Effect

Five years of civil war has torn Syria apart. Countless lives have been lost, families ripped apart, childhoods snatched, the economy destroyed. Syrians are finding out the hard way that in war there are no victors — everybody loses.

Funny thing is what’s happening in Syria and Iraq could happen anywhere in the world, even in our neighborhood. That’s why we must always strive for peace. But how do we do that? Can a handful of people thousands of miles away from the epicenter of conflict bring world peace? The answer is YES.

Have you heard of the Butterfly Effect?

The Butterfly Effect is the notion that the tiny flutter of a butterfly’s wings can cause a tornado on the other side of the world. In other words, if you change even the smallest of life’s details, you completely change its outcome. That means everything we say and do can affect our surroundings and the world at large for either good or bad.

Consider Jesus, for example. Jesus was just one man. He spent his whole life in and around Israel, moving within a 200 km radius. Yet, what he said and did 2000 years ago has affected billions of lives across the centuries and continues to do so to this very day. 

By that logic, all of us – even you – can do your bit to bring increase peace. Yes you — as small and insignificant as you may think you are — you can bring world peace.


Start with your OWN home.

Try your best to keep your spouse, your kids and parents happy. Love your wife and remain true to her. Respect your parents. Be nice to your kids.

Your spouse and kids will carry the ripple effect of what you achieved at home to their workplace and school, positively impacting the people they hang out with. You can start something good at home that will circle the globe several times.

Be good, do good. If all of us did just one thing to make our home a happier place, we would not have any wars anywhere in the world.

War looks good in movies, but sucks in real life. That’s why the Bible exhorts us: “never pay back evil for evil. Respect what is right in the sight of all men. (And) if possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.” (Romans 12:17,18). It commands us to “make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; (for) without holiness no one will see the Lord.” (Hebrews 12:14)

What goes around, come around. If you do not strive for peace, you WILL reap war and everything that war brings – death, desolation, poverty, misery. Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. (Galatians 6:7).

So, if you really love your family, your wife and kids, and you want them to be safe, strive for peace. Remember, great wars start from little wars — often kindled at home. Great peace also starts at home — often with a smile.

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Are You Successful? Really?

Don’t plan success the way the world plans success. It does not matter what the world thinks because their perception is only based on the externals.

For instance, if you are nice and courteous to everyone at work but you act like a monster at home, you are terribly unsuccessful. Because you beat the people you “love” over how you were treated by the people who didn’t love you.

The world sees you talk on your fancy phone and drive your fancy car to a fancy spa where you meet your fancy friends and they think you’ve made it. But nobody knows that little Miss Manners is actually a gorilla.

You’ve got it all wrong, Princess. You are supposed to love people and use things. Instead, you love things and use people. And you call yourself successful? Ha!

The people who really matter are the people who live with you…because their opinion is based on realities. Wanna know how successful you really are? Go ask your mom and dad. Ask your kids. Ask your spouse. Ask God. Then, we’ll talk.


Your Family Ain’t Your Enemy…Satan Is

The greatest attack today is on the institution of family. And I am not just referring to marriages, but also the relationship between parents and children.

I know many people who consider their parents to be their greatest enemies.

The devil likes that.

He knows that you cannot be a good parent yourself, or a good spouse if you do not first have a healthy relationship with your parents.

When Satan wants to puncture a relationship, he usually starts with a nightmare. He’ll work on your soul when you are asleep, causing you to dream that your dad or spouse is doing something hurtful to you. When you wake up the next morning, you are obviously upset

Satan is the father of lies. Once he sees that you are sufficiently upset, he’ll whisper something like “You know why you are suffering? It’s because of your dad.”

Your first reaction is obviously, “What nonsense!

But he’ll keep saying the same thing again and again.

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: That’s not true

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: “No way”

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: “That’s bullshit”

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”


Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: …

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: hmmm…

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: …

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: Yeah, he can be a jerk sometimes

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: He is a f#%*@#

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

The devil goes on and on…day after day. When somebody speaks a lie a 100 times, it eventually starts sounding like the truth. You start believing the lie. Once you are convinced that your dad is the enemy, you subconsciously start resenting him. Eventually, you start hating him. And just like that a relationship is destroyed.

Satan is spirit. He never tires. He knows he can break through our resistance eventually, and he is persistent. He can and will wear you down.

Once he has destroyed one relationship, he will move to the next until all your primary relationships are in the dumps. Then, he moves closer for the kill. Because what he really wants is to destroy you. It is easier for Satan to destroy you once he has got you away from the pack.

Look at the people who are given to drugs, crime and prostitution. You will find that most of them had difficult relationships with their parents when they were quite young. 

The only way to defeat Satan is to make an alliance with God. It is wise to make the strongest power in the cosmos your ally. You got to choose your camp. And middle ground is not an option. You cannot stay in the middle and expect Satan not to attack you….coz he will. God only saves those who are His. That’s why the Bible says either be hot or be cold; if you are lukewarm, you will be lost. (Revelation 3:15,16)  If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for everything.

If you choose God, He will put His mark on you. This mark is invisible to human eyes, but can be clearly seen by both angels and demons. It will cause Satan to give you a wide berth. But if you stray too far from God, he will start whispering again.

When he does that, the only way to recover is to whisper back. You must invoke the Name that is above every other name. The enemy simply can’t stand that. This is usually how victory unfolds.

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: No. That is a lie.

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: I will never believe that.

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: Get away from me…

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: The Blood of Jesus

Satan: “Your dad is your main problem”

You: The Blood of Jesus

Satan: “Your dad is your main…”

You: The Blood of Jesus

Satan: “Your dad is…

You: The Blood of Jesus

Satan: “Your dad…

You: The Blood of Jesus 

Satan: “You…

You: The Blood of Jesus

Satan: Stop it!

You: The Blood of Jesus

Satan: StoPPP!!!

You: The Blood of Jesus

Satan: Aaargh!

You: The Blood of Jesus


Usually, around this point, Satan is on the run…coz the only thing he cannot stand, the only thing he fears is the Blood of Jesus. It wears him out….every time.

That’s why the only way to defeat Satan is to get down on your knees, lift your hands up and pray.

It’s a posture of both surrender (to God) and attack (against the enemy).

When you submit to God, he fights for you. And when the battle belongs to the Lord, victory is guaranteed.

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Take It Easy

We all know that rest is important, but why is it such a big deal to God? Why does it matter so much to Him that we set apart one day every week to do nothing?

Firstly, as you may have rightly guessed, resting benefits us the most. Like every other Commandment, God instituted this one too for our good. He is the Creator and He knows His creation the best.

If your car manufacturer told you trying to go from zero to 100 miles in 6 seconds is bad for the engine, it would be unwise to not pay attention. Likewise, when God says cool it for a day once every week, He knows what He is talking about.

Yes, life is busy and each year it seems to get busier. Work, family, school, and other commitments just eat the day away. However, rest and relaxation are important. In fact, getting enough rest is imperative to living a healthy lifestyle. When you do not relax, you are putting yourself at risk for illness.

Think about it this way: God is Spirit, right? He never tires or slumbers. And yet even God rested on the Seventh Day. If God Himself felt the need to rest, then who are we to say it is not important. Would you let your children to tire themselves out all day and then stay awake all night? God cares for us just as we care for our children. And He wants what is best for us.

It is so important to God that we rest that He made it the Fourth Commandment: Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the LORD your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your manservant or maidservant, nor your animals, nor the alien within your gates. For in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy. (Exodus 20:8–11)

When you do not get enough rest, you have difficulty concentrating, thinking clearly, and even remembering things. You might not notice this at first or blame it on your busy schedule, but the more sleep and rest you miss out on, the more pronounced these symptoms will become.

Lack of rest and relaxation can also affect your mood. It is a proven fact that when individuals miss out on good nightly rest their personality is affected and they are generally grumpy, less patient, and snap easier. In retrospect, missing out on rest to fit in all those activities is not much fun at all.

Incidentally, the first holy thing in all creation was not a people or a place, but a day. God made everything in creation and called it good, but when God rested on the seventh day, He called it holy.

The best part about obeying God and resting is that He rewards us for being good to ourselves. Look at what He did for Scottish athlete Eric Liddell.

During the summer of 1924, the Olympics were hosted by Paris. Liddell, a committed Christian, refused to run on Sunday (the Christian Sabbath), with the consequence that he was forced to withdraw from the 100 meters race, his best event. The schedule had been published several months earlier, and his decision was made well before the Games began. Liddell spent the intervening months training for the 400 meters, an event in which he had previously excelled. Even so, his success in the 400m was largely unexpected.

The day of 400 meters race came, and as Liddell went to the starting blocks, an American masseur slipped a piece of paper into Liddell’s hand with a quotation from 1 Samuel 2:30 – “Those who honor me I will honor.”

Liddell not only won the race, but broke the existing world record with a time of 47.6 seconds. His performance in the 400 meters in Paris remained a world record for four years and a European record for 12 years.

So, the next time you think it is a good idea to stay up late to complete a task or hang out with friends, think again.

I conclude with an excerpt from the Book of Isaiah: “If you treat the Sabbath as sacred and do not pursue your own interests on that day; if you value my holy day and honor it by not traveling, working, or talking idly on that day, then you will find the joy that comes from serving me. I will make you honored all over the world, and you will enjoy the land I gave to your ancestor, Jacob. I, the Lord, have spoken.” (Isaiah 58:13,14)

This passage suggests the Sabbath is a gateway through which we can experience the best that life has to offer.

Want to have it all? No problem. God wants that for us too and much, much more. And the Sabbath rest is God’s answer to making it all happen. It establishes the inalienable human right to rest and prosper. And prosper you certainly will. Just try it!