Kevin Menezes

Loved and Saved by God alone to Love and Serve God alone.


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God, the Devil, and Adenoids

One of the biggest crisis I faced as a father is watching my 3-year-old suffer from an illness that neither the doctors nor I could explain. Every night, I watched my otherwise happy-go-lucky and playful child toss and turn in his bed and then inexplicably start coughing and coughing till neither he nor we could sleep. The countless sleepless nights took a toll on my son’s health and my sanity.

We visited more doctors then I can remember. All of them said the same thing: “Your son is fine, but he suffering from an allergy that apparently only flares up at night.” But none of them could tell me what he was allergic to. One doctor said this, the other doctor said that. Homeopathy, Allopathy – we tried it all. Nothing worked.

My son’s illness strained my marriage too. I would come home from work at the end of the day and sit down for dinner with my wife, talking about all the things that couples talk about. But then suddenly my son would have one of his coughing bouts and all romance would fly off the window. It’s hard to be romantic or anything else when your child is sick.

In my desperate search for the mystery allergen, I started de-cluttering the house – I changed the upholstery, rugs, carpets… We changed food brands and tried new diets every week. I lost countless hours chasing appointments in different hospitals around the city. I spent thousands on medicines. I considered everything there was to consider. I even considered changing my house.

I also struggled with God. And I waged warfare on the devil. I prayed and prayed and fasted and prayed some more, searching for an answer. Exasperated, one day, I sat in my car and let out a loud scream and then cried all the way back from work. When I got back home around midnight, I pulled out my Bible, sat next to my son, who was fast asleep and read the Book of Psalms out aloud until morning. After months – no years – of praying and fasting, I finally got my breakthrough. The answer was one word – ADENOIDS.

Adenoids are lymph tissues that sit in the upper airway between the nose and the back of the throat. They are similar to tonsils and help the body prevent or fight infections by trapping bacteria and germs. However, prolonged allergies and infections can cause the adenoids themselves to become swollen. Enlarged and inflamed adenoids can make breathing difficult, disrupt sleep and lead to recurring respiratory infections.

Turns out, this is a fairly common problem, especially among preschool kids. The remedy is to either treat the adenoids through medication or, as a last resort, have them taken out surgically. Sometimes, tonsils and adenoids are removed at the same time. I discovered that both of these are common surgeries for kids to have.

Once I found out what the problem was, I spent all my free time researching about adenoids. I obviously didn’t want my son to have his adenoids taken out through surgery, which is what most exasperated parents do. To me, that’s like taking out the engine alarm light in your car when it warns you that the engine is overheating. The alarm light is NOT the problem; it only tells you there is a problem, and taking it out won’t cool the engine. By that same token, if an allergy is causing your child’s adenoids to swell, you should not rush to have the adenoids or tonsils taken out. The adenoids are NOT the problem; they only indicate that there is problem — in my son’s case, an allergy.

Anyways, after lots of praying, fasting and reading, I finally discovered that my son was allergic to dairy products. Kids allergic to milk?! Who would have thought! But that’s what it was. In fact, nearly 70-80% of childhood allergies are in some way or the other related to food. Why is that so? I don’t know, but I am guessing it is all about balance. When you have too much of one thing in your diet, the balance is broken and the body’s alarm signals go off. If you ignore the signals, you could end up with major diseases such as diabetes, high blood pressure, hypertension, heart ailments, stroke, cancer, etc. So, it’s best to maintain a balance in everything, especially your diet.

I thank God for bringing me through the biggest crisis I faced as a father. I also learned an important lesson: Prayer is our best line of defense, but you cannot always pray everything away. You need spiritual answers for spiritual issues and natural solutions for natural problems. For instance, you may be a praying man, but if your house was burning, you would do better to get a bucket of water first instead of sitting down and praying about it. Prayer does, however, open the eyes of our understanding and allows for God to point us in the right direction. That’s why we must never stop praying.

Screenshot_2016-05-04-20-27-33So, does this mean that sometimes even God is powerless to help? Of course, Not! On the contrary, He can do far beyond our wildest imagination. I have personally benefited from divine healing and protection on countless occasions. I was suffering from sinusitis and a dislocated shoulder for years. I was healed of both by simply entering a place of worship — I had not even begun to pray; i just happened to be in the right place at the right time.

Um, if God can heal people just like that, why did He not heal your son? Good question. Look at it this way. If a smoker contracts lung cancer and God healed him, what would be the incentive for this man to stop smoking. Chances are he would contract the same disease again. Sometimes, God does not heal people right away because He wants them to wake up to what’s killing them. If God had healed my son right away, chances are I would continue giving him the same things that caused his adenoids to swell.

Anyways, to cut the long story short, we sleep well now. My son’s health is the best it has been in years. Most importantly, he did not lose any body parts. In my opinion, surgery is the prerogative of the busy and the rich. My heart grieves for children whose are parents are so busy that they completely miss all the red signals till it is too late. Oftentimes, these kids suffer from minor medical issues, but have to undergo major surgeries just because their parents were too busy to sit down, think and pray about what needed to be done.

This post is a shout-out to all parents considering a tonsillectomy or an adenoidectomy. Before you put your child under the surgical knife, I suggest you take a closer look at what your kid is eating. Try cutting out dairy products from his diet for about three weeks. Also, cut out processed and junk food, especially spicy and fried foods. We tried it and it’s worked wonders for us.

Last but not the least: Don’t forget to pray.

Hot or Not ~ I am Still Toasting Me

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Whenever I chance upon magazines like Men’s Health at the mall and look at men’s abs, I catch myself wishing I had those six-pack abs, instead of the jelly belly I am currently sporting. 🙂

I try to eat healthy and work out when I can. Frankly, I’d love to spend hours at the gym if I could. But my life schedule does not allow me the luxury of making that beach body look my primary goal in life, no matter how much I wish for it.

And, in retrospect, it doesn’t really matter. The world tells women you are only as good as you look. It tells guys you are only lovable if you have a rock hard body.

It’s all just a load of crap!

I read today that in the US, 50% of all preschool  girls (3 to 5 years old) worry that they are too fat. Eating disorders are up; self esteem is down. What’s wrong with that? EVERYTHING!

Our primary goal in life should be to be healthy, not erotically attractive. In fact, I find average, smiling, loving, content, happy people who have accepted and dance in the beauty that God has granted them quite stunning too. Plus, you know for a fact that they are the real deal and totally legit because their beauty has not been purchased at a beauty store — it shines from within!

And so I choose NOT to let fashion magazines body-shame me or talk me down. I am old enough to realize by now that how I see myself and talk about myself is more important than how others see me. And that outlook makes a world of difference to me, my girl and, most importantly, my kids.

I am raising my boys to be confident, young men. And I am choosing to lead by example. When they grow up, I hope and pray that they will cherish the girl-women that will one day enter their lives for who they are on the inside, rather than the media-reinforced image of “perfect” that only focuses on the outside.

So, thanks, but no thanks.

Yes! I am still gunning for a healthier me. But even if that does not happen, you’ll find me splayed on my couch, toasting life and celebrating me. 🙂